For the Love of God, Wash Me

Once a week, Sweet P goes to ballet. It’s always a scramble from work to school to class, last week especially so. We came in hot. Eight minutes late, Goldfish crumbs and the scent of her little sister’s steaming diaper trailing behind us.

Once settled on the benches with the other parents, I was ready to just relax. Except I took one look at my little ballerina, saw the mischief in her eye, and knew: This was going to be a long one.

And I was right. With Baby Sis in one arm, I spent the next half an hour waving and wagging my finger, saying things like, “Share with your friend!”, “Take turns!” and “Wands aren’t for hitting!” Each time I spoke, she’d performatively pout, sticking her thumb in her mouth and falling flat as a pancake to the floor.

I felt like all eyes were on me to see how I’d wrangle my tiny overtired dancer.

Finally, I stood and called Sweet P over to where I was sitting. “Let’s take a break,” I said, feeling like I was speaking to the room as much as to her.

Thankfully, the little breather did the trick, and the rest of class went about as well as it could’ve. I settled back into my seat and glanced at my watch. Only 15 minutes to go. We did it! Just as I started to relax, I noticed I could feel the AC blasting, and not just on my face.

I looked down. In the hustle and bustle, my top had unbuttoned about four too many. My entire bra was out. Which is OK if you’re making a fashion statement, but I’m pretty sure the only statement my decade-old nude bra was making was, “For the love of God, wash me.”

I wanted to laugh and cry all at once. Instead, I quickly buttoned myself back up and got our things together so we could leave as soon as class was over.

As I helped Sweet P with her sneakers, I heard another mom say, “Well, we were a hot mess today.” At first I thought she was talking about me, but I looked over and saw she was wiping spilled water from the floor.

She looked just as exasperated as me.

I’d just been too wrapped in my own mess to realize I wasn’t the only one.